Article From: Mira Mesa Wrestling
Mira Mesa Wrestling sat down to speak with father-son duo Christian and Timothy Hill. Christian has been an assistant wrestling coach at Mira Mesa for the past two seasons. Timothy began wrestling as a freshman at Mira Mesa and proceeded to not record even a single victory his entire first year wrestling. This season, Tim was a League Champion, Conference Champion, CIF runner-up and State Qualifier. He will be wrestling at Arizona Christian University this fall. Tim was also the recipient of Tom Hawkins Award, awarded by the Kiwanis Club annually to a student-athlete that excels on the ‘field’ and in the classroom. Read as they discuss extreme weight loss, loss of a loved one and what Mira Mesa Wrestling has meant to them.
What sports had you tried before wrestling, and what made you decide to try wrestling?
Tim: I tried baseball, tennis and football. I was cut from the football team and in the other sports I felt put to the side and not appreciated. My dad talked to me before high school about his wrestling career, so I wanted to try it.
How did your first season of wrestling go?
Tim: At my first tournament, my JV coaches decided to put someone else in the dual to try to win. They apologized, but wanted to try to win and saw a better option than me. Coach Craig [VanDyke], the head coach, walked up to me later and said, “Hey Tim, how have your matches gone today?” I let him know I didn’t get a match. He left and came back a few minutes later and told me I would have two matches that day. I was so happy and excited because this coach, that I really looked up to, wanted to give me an opportunity to wrestle. I felt he believed in me. That is something that pushed me my entire high school career. It was a really meaningful experience for me.
Even though I didn’t win any matches that first year, I wanted to be there. It was hard but I saw progression in myself and enjoyed the hard work. I looked up to the varsity wrestlers and started to make a mental shift leading into the off-season.
How did you become a wrestling coach at Mira Mesa?
Christian: At the end of Tim’s sophomore year, we were cleaning up after a match. Tim ran over to me and said, “Coach Craig wants to talk to you.” Apparently he found out I wrestled. In talking with Coach Craig, we found out that we suffered similar career-ending injuries. He said to me, “Well, why aren’t you coaching?” He invited me to be a coach. I went and spoke with my wife [Fran] to get her blessing and she agreed it would be a great idea. I started coaching that off-season leading into Tim’s junior year.
What was it like watching Tim wrestle?
Christian: Wrestling in high school was my thing. Watching Tim get excited about wrestling and seeing him commit and work through pain and heartache, it brought a lot back to me; It was really exciting to watch that growth in Timothy.
After watching Tim lose every match as a freshman, were you concerned he would quit?
Christian: Not really. He made a commitment. When I was buying him wrestling shoes, I said, if we get these, you have to finish the season. Tim said, “I’m committing to four years!” I trusted him in that, and even though he had hard times, he was excited for his sophomore season.
What were the key things that turned you from a winless freshman into a state ranked wrestler?
Tim: My sophomore year, I had a really good wrestling partner, Jay [Magdaraog]. (Jay is now a volunteer assistant coach with Mira Mesa Wrestling). Jay only had one hand, but I saw his mentality, how he pushed through tough stuff and that really made me think, “If Jay can have this attitude, I can too, and even do better.” I saw guys like Devin [Hayes] and Jasvinder [Singh], (both state qualifiers), and wanted to do better than they did. I told myself everyday that I was going to go to state.
How do you feel about Timothy wrestling in college?
Christian: You always hear about parents living through their kids, I didn’t want to be that parent that drove him for my own ambitions. I always hoped that he would want to wrestle in college, but never wanted to push for that. I’m so proud of not only what he’s done on the mat, but also what he’s done in school. He struggled his freshman year with academics, but got his act together and finished with a 3.7 GPA.
You two have lost a combined 230 pounds since becoming a part of the Mira Mesa family. Describe how you helped each other in this health journey.
Tim(80 lbs. lost): When I first started it was very hard because my family’s eating habits were not good. We had junk food around the house. Wrestling was something that was more important than the junk food and bad eating with my friends. When I had lost about 30 pounds, I came home and my dad said how cool and inspirational it was. Even though I wasn’t looking for recognition, I realized that it could help others and helped to drive and push me further.
Christian(150 lbs. lost): When Tim was a freshman he was just this fat little teddy bear. After that season he got committed and over the summer changed his eating habits and activity level: that really inspired me. I thought, “I was a wrestler once, and I don’t look like one anymore, I need to get back there.” I knew I could do it because I watched my son do it. He made a quote for me, which he put in my phone: “Do what you must today, so you can be the man you want to be tomorrow.” It’s still there, because it means a lot. It gave me a lot of strength. It’s a message from one of my greatest heroes, my son.
What was the greatest adversity you faced during your time at Mira Mesa?
Tim: Definitely my mom passing away before my junior wrestling season. Prior to her passing, I just kept telling myself that she was sick, but nothing bad would happen. Right before she passed away we had an argument. I was waiting for her to come home to apologize, but she never had the opportunity to come home. For many weeks after that I couldn’t focus, I became very antisocial; I kept to myself and didn’t know what to do. I know I had my dad and my family, but felt like they didn’t know what I was going through at that time, not being able to make amends with my mom. The only constant in my life was wrestling, I knew I was struggling in my personal life, but I knew if I worked harder and accomplished my goals that she would be watching me and be proud of me.
Christian, how did you guide Tim while finding healing for yourself?
Christian: It was the hardest thing I’ve ever been through. There were three things that got me through: God, Timothy and wrestling. I knew Timothy was going through a lot and I needed to be there for him. He was 16 years old and in a tough spot. Mira Mesa Wrestling gave me a family to trust my son with. We have a great coaching staff. I look at the wrestlers as my boys, and I want the best for them, as I do for Tim. Knowing there was a brotherhood really helped me get through it. My first full season was right after Fran passed, so it was really perfect timing to start coaching. I’m thankful for that.
What do you admire most about each other?
Christian: I admire Tim’s resilience. When he sets his mind to something, he does everything in his power to make that happen. It’s really inspiring to see his commitment level.
Tim: He’s a bull, when he goes, he goes! In talking to my uncles, they say the same. Whenever I’ve wrestled with him or seen him work, he goes hard! When he has something in his mind, he does it, does it well and with strength.
What advice would you give people facing adversity?
Christian: Listen to yourself. Stop and think about what your goal was. Whatever it is in your life, remember that initial goal, what drove you to it, and let everything else go, such as what others think. Just focus on what you need to do. Keep yourself grounded in family and God and you are bound to succeed.
Tim: The biggest thing is to stop feeling sorry for yourself. My wrestling coaches said this to us often. There is definitely someone out there that is doing more than you, that has it harder than you, etc. You need to know if you are at rock bottom, the only way to go is up. So if you keep the mentality to do what you can to improve, and stop feeling sorry for yourself, you are going to improve. Even if it’s little bits at a time, those add up.
The wrestling team uses an acronym, G.R.A.C.E. that stands for Gratitude, Respect, Awareness, Communication and Embrace. Which of those are the biggest contributors to your success?
Tim: Embrace is probably my favorite. Coach Logue says to “embrace the suck” which is kind of funny, but it’s true. If you don’t embrace the hard times, they will eat you up. When you embrace the bad times, other smaller hard times become easier to deal with, because you know you made it through tougher times. It’s not that bad when you embrace those things. Gratitude is important too, being grateful for the good things and the bad things. When we embrace and are grateful for both, it allows us to succeed.
Christian: Communication was big for Tim and I. I went to every match, a lot of times he wasn’t ready to talk, and I gave him space. But in time, he would come to me and talk. He struggled with some skin issues with the extreme weight loss. The fact that he had an outlet was important. To be able to share those things is good in dealing with frustration. And communication in the happy times is really big. A lot of people are afraid to share what they are feeling. Understanding real concerns that you can express and communicate, we can understand each other better.
Leave us with your greatest memory of your time together in wrestling.
Christian: It has to be the culmination of everything at the California State Tournament. I know what it took to get him there. He battled heartache and injuries, including a broken hand, and the loss of his mother, but he refused to stop wrestling. He kept fighting. We set up a plan together to bulk him up the right way: He went from 145 lbs his junior year, to 172 lbs as a senior. So getting to state was that cap to something beautiful.
Tim: My favorite memory with my dad is when I first wrestled him on the mats. Growing up we had roughhoused and such, but the first time actually getting him to wrestle when I had ability was memorable. I remember thinking afterward how strong he was. He told me he thought I could beat him while still in high school. It was a really great feeling.
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